Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
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