ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
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