I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
did i just pee glitter
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
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