You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
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