So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
this beer tastes like vomit already
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
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