where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
