I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
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