They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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