i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Randomize
