I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
NoShamevember. You game?
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Randomize
