Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
Randomize