thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
smell my finger.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
