I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize