then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
