Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
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