ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
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