the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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