So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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