Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
i out mim tonsoeep
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