i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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