return my video game
We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
Randomize
