All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
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