I'm at a crab and wine festival with my dad. He just introduced me as his girlfriend to all of his co-workers. I am so drunk I thought he was serious.
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
Drunk is a universal language darling
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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