Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
