8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
There's always time for handjobs
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
Fav 3 1048 608 share tweet
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize