haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
