Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
I think I sprained my soul last night
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
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