I think i sorta joined a cult last night
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Randomize
