we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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