Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
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