with your own penis?
White coat. Heels.
Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
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