Just cropdusted the office
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
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