i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
