happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
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