I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
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