what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
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