i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
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