have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Randomize
