I am apparently in rockville maryland. I just threw up my tater tots I had fro brunch in a safeway parking lot. Then ordered a pizza. Pepperoni and pineapple. I'm sitting in the parking lot, next to my barf, waiting for my pizza. WOOF. Someone just gave me an oxycontin tab. Can u come get me? I'm scared
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
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