why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
Randomize
