I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
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