the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Randomize
