Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
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