all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Randomize
