I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
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