I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize
