please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
Randomize
