i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize
