ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
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