Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
We talked him into tasing himself.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
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