And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
