i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
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